I will never forget Mothers Day of 2002. Technically it was my first Mothers Day, however it was not the joyful occasion that I had anticipated. March 21st had been our due date for our first baby, I had dreamt of celebrating my first mothers day with our baby in my arms. Instead, Anthony was born in November of 2001 at 22 weeks.
There were so many friends and family members that were there for us, comforting us as much as possible. One particular act really stands out to me. My friend Suzette from church informed me that she was taking a day off of work and was going to come spend the day with me. She brought lunch and just sat with me all day and let me talk things out. I told her that one of the things that I had really been looking forward to, was being able to stand up with all the moms at church on Mothers Day. Kind of a trivial thing in the grand scheme of things, but still something that really meant a lot to me. Every year our church acknowledges the Moms, it's not a grand production, but it's still really special. I had been bitten by the baby bug a couple years prior, so I had been waiting impatiently for my turn to stand up with the moms. I would have to wait again.
Her firm response was that I was in fact a mother, and there was no reason why I couldn't stand up with the other moms. In fact, she would stand right next to me for support!
So the months went by and the day finally arrived. God gave me a gift to help me get through the day, there was a new life growing inside me! I wore a corsage with two roses, one for Anthony and one for the new baby. And then it was time for the mothers to be acknowledged. Armed with my friends kind words, I was able to stand with the other moms. Tears in my eyes, but my head held high.
This may seem like such a silly little thing to some. But after losing Anthony I felt like such a failure. I had waited for what seemed like so long just to get pregnant, and then went through so much during the 5 months of pregnancy. So many hopes and dreams, not to mention all the items that had been lovingly purchased only to be put away after we lost him. So did this moment in time make all that go away? No, but it restored my dignity, and validated all the hard work that was put into trying to keep my baby safe.
